Verja the Lost Jungle Bunny

JOKES!

TEACHER: I hope I didn't see you peeping at someone else's paper during the test, Billy.
BILLY: I hope so, too.

MRS. SMITH: Would you join me in a cup of tea?
MRS. BROWN: I don't think we'll both fit.

PIANO TUNER: I've come to tune your piano!
LADY: But we didn't send for you.
PIANO TUNER: No, but your neighbors did.

YOUNG MAN: I've come to ask for your daughter's hand.
FATHER: You'll have to take all of her or it's no deal.

GRANDMA: I like to go to bed and get up with the chickens, don't you?
BETTY: No, I like to sleep in my own bed.

Two little boys were looking at an abstract painting in an art gallery.
"Let's run," said one, "Before they say we did it."

HENRY: This poor street-bum came to the door last night telling me he hadn't had a bite in two weeks.
BOB: Poor fellow. What did you do?
HENRY: Bit him, of course.

GIRL (standing in the middle of a busy road) : Officer, can you tell me the fastest way to get to the hospital?
POLICEMAN: Just stay right where you are, ma'am.

DWAYNE: Mommy, why do you have so many gray hairs?
MOTHER: I suppose it's because you cause me so much worry.
DWAYNE: Wow. You must have been horrible to Grandma, then!

JESSICA: Is it correct to say that you water your horse, Ma?
MOTHER: Yes, honey.
JESSICA: Then I'm going to milk my cat.

AUNTIE: Come on, Billy, dear, eat your cabbage! It's good for growing children!
BILLY: I don't want to grow any children.

NOAH (To his son who is fishing) : Go easy on the bait! Remember, I've only got two worms!

In the snake house at the zoo, one snake glanced nervously at it's brother and said,
"Are we supposed to be poisonous?"
"Dunno. Why?"
"Cause I just bit my lip."

Two Indians were watching distant smoke signals. When they were finished, White Horse looked at Soaring Eagle and said, "We've got to do something about Little Big Horse. His spelling is something awful."

TEACHER (on phone): You say Tommy can't come to school because he has a cold? To whom am I speaking?
VOICE: This is my father.

A little boy was given a finger-print scanner for his birthday.
"Son," said his father, "Did you know that NO two finger-prints are the same? Every one is different?"
After playing around with his scanner for two days, the little boy went up to his father and said,
"I have just proved Science wrong! I found three finger-prints, separate, that are all exactly the same."
"Whose?"
"Three people. One is YOU, another is Santa Claus, and the other is that rascal who steals cookies from Mom's Cookie Jar."

1st CANNIBAL: I always feel sick after eating a missionary. Why's that?
2nd CANNIBAL: Because you can't keep a good man down.